Saturday 31 January 2009

Terrified - Is everyone terrified by their 8 month old?

My son terrifies me!
Sometimes when he does something new it is truly just exciting & happy - like when he started to say mom.  Sometimes when he does something new it is exciting & happy & very scary. He is now standing and starting to walk, but he still has no clue about where he is & what can happen when he falls.  He is stubborn and when he wants something he will keep trying until he gets it.  He would launch himself off the couch at the rectangular glass topped coffee table to get the remote (he is obsessed with remotes) if I didn't hold him back - doesn't he know that this is dangerous.

Husband and I have gone over many baby-proofing ideas; lock baby in a box (not gonna do it, seems like it might hamper his development), straight jackets (can't find one small enough),  attaching his  sleeper to his sheets, etc.

After doing some research it seems that we are not the only ones thinking about this, found some tents and sleep systems that are designed to keep him in his crib, hoping that we can find something that will let us feel good, will keep him safe but not curb his enthusiasm.  I would hate to turn him into the lazy kid who just sits like a lump, he already has a bad influence in his couch potato Dad.




Wednesday 28 January 2009

Sleep

Why won't my child sleep?

Why won't he sleep all night?

Why will he sleep in my arms but as soon as I put him down in his bed he wakes up?

I know I just asked a bunch of questions, but they are rhetorical.  I have/am trying all kinds of things to make the sleep situation better but they haven't worked.  We have gone through various times off and on through his 8 months where he has slept through the night & napped during the day, but those times have never lasted more than a week.

Don't tell me to just put him down and let him cry.
1.  If my son is put down in his crib and is not asleep, he doesn't just lay there and cry, he crawls or pulls himself into a stand - often falling down and banging his head on the crib slats.
2.  Why is it o.k. to ignore his need for comfort in this situation but not in others.
3.  I won't be able to ignore his cries for long enough to do this, so there doesn't seem to be a point in starting.
4.  For me it feels selfish to do this.
5.  It doesn't always work, and doesn't always work in 3 nights as the trainers would have you believe.  (I have read other's blogs where they have gone months and their baby is still crying and not putting themselves to sleep.)


Tuesday 20 January 2009

Advice & criticism

Throughout life you get lots of unsolicited advice (don't call him let him call you, ask for a bigger raise, that colour is all wrong for you).  When you get married you get lots more advice (flowers are important, you need a bigger cake....).  When you are pregnant, even more (don't eat peanut butter, get lots of sleep now, don't buy anything you will get tons at the shower).  Nothing compares to what you get when you have a baby.

There is so much info and so much of it is conflicting, I often find it difficult to filter.  

Dress Code:
- wear pajamas all day that way you are comfy and visitors won't expect you to serve them
- get showered and dressed every day - you will feel better and get more done

Sleep:
- when the baby is sleeping you should be sleeping
- do your chores/phone calls, etc when the baby is napping so that you  are paying full attention to the baby

Baby's Crib:
- don't use bumper pads they are dangerous > baby can suffocate use for climbing
- use bumper pads, they keep baby safe > keep baby from bruising if they bump head on crib, keep babies limbs safe if they stick out of the rails

It goes on and on.  I have one person in my life who has been the best with no unsolicited advice, who will give advice when asked, and does not give criticism masking as advice, and I will always love this person for that.

The hidden criticism/judgement is the worst.  How can it not be a criticism if every time you talk to someone they ask the same question, and then give the same advice which you have already told them you are not going to do.  Obviously they disagree with what you are doing.






My First Post Ever

This is my first posting to my blog.

Baby has been asleep for about 15 minutes and miraculously, he is in his crib and not in my lap.  I may only have a few more minutes before he wakes up crying for mam, so this might be short.

I have never been so continuously exhausted in my life.

I have an eight month old baby boy, who is a beautiful joy.  He has enriched my life and changed how I see pretty much everything, mostly sleep.  I have a wonderful husband who I love to death, and is great with baby.  Husband also works huge hours with a too long commute which leaves me alone with baby a lot.

During my pregnancy, I was constantly amazed at how I was losing control over my life, and people  kept telling  me that this was training for how little control I would have once the baby was born, what an understatement.  I know that there are lots of parents who are in control, they set the babies schedule (feed at 11am for 15 minutes, nap at 11:30 for 1 hour, etc) but this hasn't happened for me and my baby.   People say "well just put him in the crib when he is tired and leave him"  I tried that this morning and each time I lay him down on his back, he instantly flipped over to crawl around.  So, instead of sleeping, he stood up in his crib for the first time this morning.

Uh oh, there is moaning & crying coming from the other room, gotta go......