Tuesday, 14 April 2009

Separation Anxiety???

As I have written before, we have been worried about Baby's separation anxiety and my return to work which will require Baby to go to DayCare.

Last week-end Grandma made another attempt at baby-sitting the Baby while I went out briefly to pick up a car rental.  So, as usual  Grandma was late, although luckily Baby and I were napping so I didn't know she was late until she was here, which meant that I didn't stress about missing the car rental.  As soon as Baby saw Grandma he  started to cry, he was wailing and I had about 5 minutes to get out if I was going to get to the rental location before they closed.  Grandma offered to drive instead of me taking the subway which I declined. (I assumed that the offer was to save me time, however taking the subway is about twice as fast as putting the car seat in Grandma's car, getting Baby dressed and then driving)  (It only occurred to me after I left that maybe that was her way of saying that I shouldn't leave her alone with the crier.)  I did ask if she was sure it was o.k. for me to leave him with her like that and she said to go, so I went.  I was only gone for about an hour, and he was o.k. but did cry off and on. 

On Sunday we were at Grandpa's for Easter Dinner.  At various  times during the afternoon Baby would be in a different room than I and would be fine, unless I came into the room.  Whenever I came into the room, he would start whining and come directly to me for some clinging on.  

Today, Baby and I went to a toilet training seminar at our local Early Years Centre.  Baby was a bit distracted and did not want to just sit and listen to the session about the potty.  He is currently teething and I was unsure how he was going to be.  He played in the middle of the group for a while but decided to crawl off to the play areas.  I followed him and brought him back but he wanted none of that.  The next time he crawled off and I went to follow, one of the staff suggested that I just leave him and he would probably come back to me.  I tried it, he did not come back, instead he ended up playing for about 1/2 hour with one of the volunteers without even a glance at me.   The only reason he came back to me was that he was really wanting to nurse and nap.

So I don't know if he really has separation anxiety.  Bad baby-sit with Grandma, Good baby-sit with Grandpa, middle of the road baby-sit with Grandma, o.k. without mom in room, play with total stranger while ignoring mom.  I am starting to think that he will probably be o.k. with day care.  He seems fine with strangers and he likes to play and interact with others whether I am with him or not.  I am hoping anyway, because it is breaking my heart already that I am going to have to leave him with others to take care of.  It will break so much more if I know that he is having a bad time.

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