I know that I am not ready to date. I know that if I went on a date I would be completely pathetic and the poor sucker sitting across from me would run to the nearest monastery and never date again. I know that if I went on a date, I wouldn't be cute & funny & playful. All that said, I got an email from match.ca and clicked on the link, I was curious.
Before I met exHusband, I had a whole list of rules/criteria about meeting men to date:
- no blondes
- not shorter than me
- no family connection
- no set-ups
- if you meet in a bar then it is a one-night stand only - no relationship
- not at work
- no dating services, no internet
- no divorces
- no children
But none of this seems to be applicable anymore.
So anyway, I clicked on the link and was taken to the registration for the dating service. It asked me all kinds of questions about myself and then it started to ask me questions about the person I wanted to date. Salary range, ethnicity, job, physical characteristics, etc. I kept putting them all as "no preference". I had no idea what I would want and it just seemed so wrong.
It doesn't matter how much money someone makes or if they are an artist or an ad exec. It doesn't matter if someone is blonde or slender. It matters that you get along with the person, it matters if they appreciate you, it matters if they make you laugh, it matters if they laugh at your jokes, it matters if when you hold their hand you feel safe like that hand will stop all the bad things in the world from happening to you, it matters that when you kiss them you feel like you are home.
I had that all once and I hope that I can have it again some day, but I don't think that I will find it from a dating service, I need to see & hear & feel the person.